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Poetry In Despair [entries|friends|calendar]
Ashly_J

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The Father [10 Jul 2009|11:17pm]
Your shadows always kept you from me.
I never saw the father, the people had their king.
Your secrets served to spare me your sins.
How you always said,
"Stand tall son, shake the heavens.
Stand proud son, quake the earth."
My lord, rest your weary shoulders.
I'm strong enough now to bear your cross.
My lord, hang your heavy heart.
I'm strong enough now to bear your curse.
I'm a greater demon than those which haunt you.
There is no son without the father.*
Glory be, my king, glory be.
By you, I learned to stand, to hunt, to fight, to be a man.
There is no prince without the king.
I'll own this crown handed down.
Rest now.
By your leave, your burden is mine.
1 Probably broke down and cried| If you stare too long

The Fox And The Hellhound III [14 Jun 2009|11:34pm]
This is what I am. This is what I am.
This is what i've become.
Prince of suffering, Tragedy's hero, The Hellseeker.
So Hell's beast I am. A monster i've become.
I stand proof the dead still walk.
This weathered corpse called me.
How far i've fallen, how deep I yet sink
Where have I gone?
Where is it i've landed?
I find myself here under skies of black.
And it's laughing at me now.
I see the world but nothing real can reach me here.
Hooks tear at me from every direction.
And worse, her voice coats the air.
Endlessly, a reminder of just how far I've strayed.
Endlessly.
So here I stand this hollow shell called me.
I feel no light, I know no warmth.
I have nothing but these hooks, excoriation eternal.
My suffering will be legendary even in hell.
It's all her, ever her.
Endless, sings the wind.
Endless.
3 Probably broke down and cried| If you stare too long

[23 Apr 2009|01:15am]
I'm leaving this town with my lips sewn shut.
Words burn like fire on the tup of my tongue.
But I won't sever these sutures until I can't smell this land
Torment never ends, the scars don't heal.
Still, my skin is my own and my face stretched anew.
So i'll spin a new web and grow out my hair.
For now tell the children the story of the wolf.
And how there's still a reason they should fear the dark.
Even if the morrow is shrouded in fog
My suffering will be legendary, even in hell.
Though nothing shall forestall my return.
Father, i'll come back and claim the crown.
I'll stand stall, and shake the heavens.
I'll stand proud, and quake the earth.
If you stare too long

Hell Is Where The Heart Is [28 Feb 2009|12:38am]
I awake to a sound. That is to say, I become increasingly aware
of my surroundings and hear a scuttle. No, more of a scurry.
I'm not sure if I had been truly asleep. One is often unsure when
one is actually drifting through the realm of Morpheus, Lord of Dream.
This sound?
This not quite silence gnawing at my consciousness demands attention,
and so my attention it shall have. I perk my ears in location of
the roguish intruder which had dared to arouse me from what may
have been The Sandman's grip.
A scuttle is it? No, more of a scurry. Definitely a scurry.
With one deft motion I bring the claw of my forefinger down and
through its side, straight into the belly of the perpetrator.
I hold the tiny beast aloft as my eyes come into focus in the darkness.
"And just what are you?"
It has short, matted, gray blotchy fur. Several antennae-like feelers
extend from its small pink nose. No doubt, they are for navigating
the dark world of ours. A long thin tail writhes in place at this
poor soul's backside.
"Whatever you call yourself, whatever your name may be. I shall call
you a meal." I sink my fangs into this meek creature and feel its
spine shatter. A soft screech escapes and hot viscous liquid gushes
down my throat. I finally draw myself off my back and sit up.
I realize this is well likely the first meal I have eaten in
a solid century. Well, I imagine a century. I am not one of those
wretches who bothers carving minutes into my side to keep the time.
How did you get here little one?
Just how long have I been sleeping?
If you stare too long

The Fox and The Hound II: Hellseeker [11 Jul 2008|02:16am]
I'd thought you were a beautiful vision of me.
You're not, and you were never, but yet still told me you were.
You let me think it was so.
I'm not in love with you.
I can't be. It's not love.
I'm in love with the idea of you.
I must be, and it's not enough.
I'm remorseful of my naïvety.
I opened the gates of hell and let loose horrors with my own hands.
If i'm haunted, it's true. I've let hell's demons come.
I hold fragile memoriesw of the man I once was.
I see shadowed glimpses in my mind of courage he left behind.
I want to use what's left of me to place twin silvers over your eyes.
To pronounce you dead.
To light a new flame on your pyre, though ours glows embers.
To push your body out to sea despite hands broken from holding on, but I can't.
I'll stay searching through hell
If you stare too long

The children and the chief of the S.S. EPiC [04 May 2008|02:04pm]
Some things never change.
Here's lookin' at you kids.
Some things never changed
And i'm at the point where
I can't remember how long ago you fell overboard.
I promised never to turn my ship back round.
I'd never throw out a lifesaver.
I let you drown. I let you drown.
I let you drown. Drowned down I never turned back around.
I've left the ocean floor littered with my past.
Six years later i'm taking my first look back.
So it seems you've crawled to shore.
Did you find what you were looking for?
You'd be more beautiful as a coral reef
Than the mess broadcast for everyone to see.
I can't remember how long ago you fell overboard.
I promised never to turn my ship back round.
I'd never throw out a lifesaver.
I let you drown. I let you drown.
I let you drown. Drowned down I never turned back around.
I've left the ocean floor littered with my past.
If you stare too long

[24 Apr 2008|03:30pm]
Awaken the dogs. Alert the guard.
The wind won't wait for anyone.
She's restless, singing elegies to the tempest.
So sing to me.
Open me to your fury.
Call my name in your shearing melody.
I am alpha. I am omega, she said.
The beginning and the end.
Fetch the hounds. Signal the watch.
The air here is still.
Her breath is gone.
It's hopeless giving chase to the storm,
but I still hear her voice resonating the currents from her lungs.
Sing to me. Love me with your fury.
It's my name the bravest men fear.
Alpha. Omega, she said.
My beginning, she'll be my end.
If you stare too long

[28 Mar 2008|04:19pm]
From the arms of a lover to the bed of another
Tell her she's beautiful
Make her feel whole stripped bare
She needs to know, is there something more
Than satin sheet promises? I promise this
By morning she's gone. She's out of sight
Destruction won't come in the form of the sun
Showcasing the girl's tear stained face
She won't break for days
When she does no one will bear the sight
That's right, the drugs will make it right tonight
Such a sordid secret life
Put on your face, object of their lust
There's a party tonight and you won't be caught dead
Leaving breath in one pair of lungs
Showstopper, she's got her story down
She'll tell you to ask around
The beauty queen runs this river town
So claim the throne, oh queen
Drown alone in the sea
A life on the water, but swimming is beneath her
She'll sink
She's got one killer body and an awful soul
All hail the river queen
If you stare too long

[08 Mar 2008|03:25pm]
There's something wrong here.
Nineteen months of venom have slowly run their course.
Well take this, you can have it.
Here's my quill scratching parchment again.
And it's what you wanted.
It's how you wanted it.
Well come get it. Yeah come get it.
I've been sharing a bed with the devil.
I've been sleeping in.
The mustached man with the scales he dreams of
That pitchfork put right in my back.
Well spines aren't for snakes anyway.
Spines aren't for snakes pal.
I've gotta believe that it's for the best.
I shouldn't think it so negatively.
Hell's my home, I don't know why i'd ever pay rent.
Stick to your fruit from that tree boy.
If you stare too long

A Whaling City Werewolf In Hollywood [09 Feb 2008|02:57pm]
Adoption agency find this wolf a home.
In the dirt, the good life you'll never know.
She has the world but the frame's all I can call my own.
I just, I just wanted to be pretty filth.
It doesn't much matter when things crash down if you never left the ground.
I'll make hell mine.
You're name's not on the list.
Don't worry, this isn't your kind of party sugar.
I'll call the shots from my window from my throne.
I'll crawl through the mud, dig up the dirt, and make this my home.
If you stare too long

Hollywood Huh? [21 Oct 2007|09:20pm]
Now that i've slumped out every tavern
and slumbered drunk nights in every inn
Erecting my monolothic monument,
My testament to sin.
My name now can't but spill out mouths
Most of which i've spent time in.
No I don't want any pardons
From the ghosts holding waning thin.
From atop this two year tower so high,
I lost track of when it first pierced the sky.
Now that the gods are my ceiling fan
I can't help but realize.
Down there on the ground there's someone waiting for me.
And I know i'll learn to love the silver screen.
That accent could just grow on me, we'll see won't we.
Yeah hollywood must of cast its spell on me.
If you stare too long

[08 Oct 2007|10:37pm]
Never fails it goes my dick then name off your tongue
Southcoast public enemy number one.
"Did you hear what johnny's done?"
Fells like i'm under the microscope of the sun.


What do you know about hardwood floors?
Up at five a.m. just to be out the door?
That ninety min ride to just to work for
The hop you'll find a home to call yours?

I don't sweat what you read about me
On your t-mobile sidekick three.
And i'll never wear a face and be
Your teenybopper scene dream king.
2 Probably broke down and cried| If you stare too long

[06 Jul 2007|07:02pm]
specters, you would kill each other just to steal my breath
spectators, this is one thing you can't afford to miss.
this new species to the stage, I can lead your bodies to the floor.
Let's shine a light on you, you'll show right through
But how much longer till I burn in your eyes fixated on me
for so goddamn long?
Now let's see what you're made of!
If you stare too long

Breaker, this one's for you [29 May 2007|07:09pm]
Breaker, oh I been a bad bad boy.
Breaker, so i'm a traitor now?
Breaker, I've backstabbed my friends?
"Breaker, a blade can't pierce with a broken edge"
Since when are you defined by what you don't do?
Since when is inaction what makes a man?
It's just a different addiction.
Don't feed me respect
Don't preach loyalty
I'll pay my respects
When you impress me.
1 Probably broke down and cried| If you stare too long

Tremble [10 May 2007|12:20am]
Can't you feel it coming? Can't you feel it?
Can't you feel me twisting my way through the wood?
Can't you sense me, can't you at all?
In the shadows of alleys men fear to tread
In hushed voices in tongues long dead
The demons and devils speak of me.
They conspire.
My dichotomous face is the drug coursing through your veins.
Addictive, aren't I?
Buy into me and come unto me.
I'm your prince.

I am the ferryman to bring you home.
Though you will never find rest weary souls.
I will see to that.
I will see you through.


I travel through silhouettes of wrought iron fences.
1 Probably broke down and cried| If you stare too long

The Malevolence of the Pack [28 Apr 2007|04:31pm]
Slaughter the messenger.
He bears a curse.
The details are hazy on this small voodoo island hexed.
Can you broaden your horizons any more sweetheart?
Give it time, she's drowning here.
All will be ocean sweeping and pulling her under.
With eyes drawn from the coal mine that was his death.
Her face cast to the shadows on his last breath.
Won't you cherish his request?
And wolves will hunt
The wolves are hunting for you.
Oh, to behold all that mattered so much to me
To arrive here and see what monsters are we!
We speak in tongues they've never dared to unravel.
Our secrets will carry us through like coins for Charon.
Twirl in this maelstrom we dance, i've wanted for this.
1 Probably broke down and cried| If you stare too long

[03 Mar 2007|01:45pm]
Gnarled skeletal hands, flesh fleeing the scene
Pulling me in thousands of directions
The world itself wants a piece of me
Show me your hand, tell me the stakes
Pride comes before the fall
How many backs will you break to soften the blow
Sooner or later it will come to pass
She won't be worth her weight in lies
No holding hands for the hopeless
Winds of change are blowing our way
If you wish to break from this twisted tree called me
I'll let you blow away, on your way, little leaf.
If you stare too long

Die When Dead - La Danse Macabre [08 Jan 2007|11:44pm]
T-t-tonight there's no sanctuary for the weak.
It'll take a fucking champ to pull through this one.
So just in case, boys, get those glasses in the air.
A toast! A toast to you gentlemen.
Love wants you dead, so drink up drink up.
This night we're more than man, we're lions, liars.
Gladiators to the floor. It's time we feast.
If we're going down baby it'll be with style: Ars Moriendi.
And if these are to be the last sips I take.
Then Death, I drink to you.
But the kids all have heartbeats, we've got pulses
There's hope for survival, just memento mori.
And love wants us dead, but what else is new?
We will be immortal.
If you stare too long

[24 Dec 2006|05:09pm]
Silent, sleep now sleep.
Like pulling heartstrings from shadows, I watch.
I watch the light frame your face of stone.
Always hidden, slumber to evernight.
Biding baby, biding my time.
You've been bitten lady, your curse is mine.
Stumble down the hallway.
You, you can't find... you can't find your footing.
And now the lights come down.
This will be a show for the ages.
Hit the spotlight!
Sweetheart, you've got a voice for opera.
And i'm your phantom.
You're on the stage all eyes on you.
In the rafters i'm calling the shots.
If you stare too long

Die When Dead - Of Wolves And Weazuls [05 Dec 2006|12:15pm]
I stalk this night. I am fear incarnate.
A shadowed effigy, embittered elegies carried over the tension in the air.
I would have lived in Betsy Johnson designer sheep's clothing.
But enough is enough. I won't hide my fangs for another night.
And I'm sorry, so sorry, but I can't blame lunacy this time.
I want to taste your life, I want to feel the warmth.
In this world, death is your next door neighbor.
I am vengeance.
And I'm sorry, so sorry, but there's no salvation tonight.
The only silver is the screen.
They call this a curse, but you are the disease and I am the cure.
You have sown the seeds of your destruction.
Now reap this whirlwind.
Reap it.
If you stare too long

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